I still wonder...I guess it was when I moved..
Oh yeah, big change...Strange change...
Lonely!! Hell..so lonely...
I left all behind...I left all my friends behind..and even if I took them in heart with me..wasn't the same...simply couldn't feel their love anymore...oh no...
So careless...Couldn't hug them!! Couldn't watch them...Couldn't touch them...
The whole and complete situation didn't help much...My best friend ever got freak and we dumped each other.....It totally ruined my sense...
This all made me lost....and it made me new...
I had to run...to open myself...to be someone else...to find somewhere to belong...
I did it..I guess...But now...It hurts again....
Cause I am once more falling in love..and I simply never knew how to deal with love...
Hey...Don't start to make this ironic eyes!!!! That is simply part of being me, Kaugummi, to be unfortunate in love....
I had...I have... someone..but he is also far...and well...as already said I AM CARELESS...and that leaded myself into an dangerous path...pretty dangerous...I am swallowing down all I wished to not happen..
That is freak...I sorta know how it gonna end...(like all other tries except one..) And hell no...I am not ready to get even more broken....But I guess it is being to late to find an escape....
Don't know what I shall do....I am tired of this earthquakes...they ruin all when I try to rebuild...

Getting lost in life again and there is no where to hold...
Damn...it is also getting dark..
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(won't move much futher on today...gonna tell little by little ... the flashbacks will come together with the present...although many things are based on rl, it is mostly a story...)

Kisses and hugs